Dart excuses, we've all heard them and have probably come up with a few of our own. This page was actually inspired by a shirt that I got (and you can get one too) from Athletic Style. The first 40 excuses listed below are on that shirt. Have you got some that you would like to add to the list? If so, just send me an email and I'll add it. Enjoy!
|1. It's too dark in here.||21. Had too much caffeine.|
|2. My partner had to use my darts.||22. My flights won't stay on.|
|3. The bar is too crowded.||23. The boards are too close.|
|4. Can't stay awake.||24. It's too cold in here.|
|5. My partner didn't show up.||25. The jukebox is too loud.|
|6. I slipped on a puddle of beer.||26. I was one hole out.|
|7. The floor/carpet is too sticky.||27. The ceiling fan blew my dart.|
|8. The TV is too loud.||28. Bad day at work.|
|9. Can't find my mark.||29. My shafts were loose.|
|10. My arm is sore.||30. Had the wrong shoes on.|
|11. I don't do well under pressure.||31. Someone bumped me.|
|12. My clothes are too tight.||32. The board moved.|
|13. I haven't drank enough.||33. I have to go to the bathroom.|
|14. I was just having fun.||34. I wasn't used to that kind of board.|
|15. I'm watching the game on TV.||35. The light was in my eyes.|
|16. This game didn't matter.||36. It's too hot in here.|
|17. I didn't get here in time to practice.||37. The line is wrong.|
|18. New darts.||38. I drank too much.|
|19. My opponent is too cute.||39. I've never beat them before.|
|20. My darts kept bouncing out.||40. My partner made excuses all night.|
I'm not used to this line. - Laz
Mark Karczewskiemailed me these:
My flights must be off from all of those "Robin Hoods".
I must have forgot to pull the points out on my Hammerheads.
Brian Neckameyer emailed me this one, "I didn't strech properly before the game".
Hermes emailed me these two: I cannot play darts with my shoes on & Just last night I scored a 180 here, I think someone moved the oche.
Adam McEwan emailed me the following:
I'm in Arizona, and in the summertime, we have a moderate amount of bugs. My friend Larry always complains that a bug landed on his hand just as he was throwing the dart. (The bugs always seem to fly away very quickly before anyone can get a good look at them).
Well last night, we were playing a game of cricket, and in the middle of the game, guess what was hanging from the board? Oddly and poetically enough, a live cricket. For once, the "bug"-type excuse was genuine.
Ken McConnell emailed me these:
I've got to throw low numbers to get them drinking more then we are sure to win.
My girlfriend is playing for the other team.
Which dart board are we playing on.
TrsDarts@aol.com emailed me this: From the girl who'll always be a hillbilly @ heart: I can't hit anything 'cause I've got my shoes on. Simple solution- Kick off the shoes and kick some butt. :-)
Jeff Ault heard this one: "The air conditoner is blowing right on me and breaking my concentration..... I think that it's messing with my flights too!!"
Tawna's excuse goes like this: Well, here's my #1 excuse I use all the time..........."My foot hit the table!!!"........Ya see, I have a "CHICK KICK" and my left foot raises about 3 feet when I throw. So, I don't do well when there's tables, bar stools, walls, people, etc. too close to me!! :-)
Gill's excuse to his buddies is "I let you win so you wouldn't quit playing."
Richard Crummy favorite excuses are:
Robert Taylor's favorite excuses are:
Peggie excuses are - When playing against a Man: "I didn't want to hurt his pride". I use this one all the time when I let my boyfriend win: "I had to let him win, I won't get any if I don't". That's my favorite!!!
AJ excuse is "The board's off to the left/right."
Janet Hall excuse is that "I forgot my darts and had to use bar darts."
Carrie Oliveira's excuse whenever I get up to throw out of my turn: Just checking to make sure everyone was paying attention.
Brad Petrie sent me this excuse that his teammate Bobby uses: "Who turned off the magnet?"
Kelly Griffith's excuse she uses all the time when she toes-up to the line to throw and its not her turn: 'I was just checking the score.'
This is a true story of a case where an individual had a 'legitimate' excuse why he was incapable of throwing good darts (we'll call him Steve). This happened at a blind-draw tournament in a pub in Macon, Ga a number of years ago. My partner and I had made it to the final four and were getting ready to play. We were scheduled to play Steve and his partner. Steve said he had to go to the restroom before we started. I found out while he was gone that he was new to the sport and this was the furthest he had ever made it in a tournament before. We waited awhile, but Steve still hadn't returned. We decided to go ahead and start without him. My partner won the cork and started the game. It came around to Steve's turn and we we beginning to wonder about him. It was then we saw him hobbling back to the board, his eyes were all watered over. We asked him what was wrong, but he hesitated to tell us. His first throw was really bad. I had thought he had just gotten sick, but that did not explain his walk. We finally got him to confess. Apparently in his haste to return to the match, he failed to make sure that there was nothing that would impair his fly from going up all the way. Can you say OUCH! Being the caring and compassionate people we are (like all dart throwers that have been consuming their favorite beverages over a period of hours), it was all we could do to keep from laughing out loud. We all felt sorry for Steve but it just struck us as being funny. It took awhile, but Steve finally saw the humor in it and could laugh along with us. I've always wondered if he ever switched over to button-fly jeans.
The window was in the way. - according to Jayne
I ate too much before the match.
I can't throw wearing long-sleeves.
How can I concentrate when some drunk Kareoke singer is mutilating ''Surrender''? - Lance Kent's excuse for losing the finals in the 1st Flanagans Cricket Singles Tournament
She/he keeps rubbing against me. - Rich 'Sketch' Owens
The darts keep sticking to my hands. - Rich 'Sketch' Owens
The chalker won't stop moving. - Rich 'Sketch' Owens
Our team was having a league play-off for first place and all the bragging rights involved. Due to our team having lost the draw for home team we were playing at our opposition's home tavern. After our doubles matches had been played the singles started and I went off to use the facilities. Once completed, I started to leave the men's room. As I reached for the door it swung in, jamming a finger on my throwing hand. I yelped in pain, a face peeked around the door and said, "Ooops." It was the opposing team's captain! In pain, I proceeded to induce a numbed state by way of my team mates purchasing several "Medicinal Shots." I finally got to my single match, not caring too much how I threw at that point, I threw one of my best of the season! To top it off I was playing the opposing team's captain! I played him like the Irishman I am, not getting mad, getting even! Good thing I didn't drive that night as my team "doctors," dispensed a great deal of "pain-killer" that evening. We did win that play-off and I've since taken to the habit of reaching for doors with my NON-THROWING hand!
P.S. The following season I played that team captain in a tournament in Kalamazoo, MI and probably still a little "pi--ed," beat him in a 8 dart cricket game! - Rich 'Sketch' Owens
I was just trying to be nice....who would of thought you'd throw that! - Terri Bade
I didn't know the line was THAT far back! - Bill Weiland (Bill just found out that the soft-tip line is further back than the steel-tip line, 8' 0" vs 7' 9.25")
The swelling in my left hand has thrown me off balance - Juli Johnson (she had fallen at work earlier in the day and while trying to catch herself, she sprained her wrist/hand, fortunately it was her non-throwing hand)
The following 10 excuses were sent in by Doc Reeser
My arm is sore because I went to the infertility clinic today - Dale Snyder
The following excuses were sent in by Kevin Tracy
The following excuses were sent in by Shayne Burgess
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